• If the black box is never damaged it a plane crash.
    Way don't they just make the plane out of whatever they make the box out of?

    A man was at the top of the Impire State Biulding eating lunch. When he sees a man going up to the edge to the biulding with a bottle of gin in his had. The man then jumped off the edge. In a matter of min. the man was back at the top of the tower. This went on a few time. The man that was seeing this went up to the jumping man and said "How is it that you can jump off the top of this tower and not die?" The jumper said "Well all you have to do is jump off and when you get close to the bottom take a sip of gin from this bottle and it will slow you down and you land on your feet. You should try it." The man grabed the bottle from him and jump. Not 30 sec. later SPALT!! the man was dead. Another man walked up and said "Super Man you are a a$$hole when you drink."

    Top Ten Worst Opening
    Lines of All Time

    #10 - You look like a hooker I knew in Phoenix.

    #9 - You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend.

    #8 - If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

    #7 - You look just like my mama. I love my mama.

    #6 - Gross! Somebody farted. Let's get out of here.

    #5 - Hey, baby, wanna go halves on a bastard?

    #4 - So... is it safe to say I'm gonna get lucky tonight?

    #3 - You'll do.

    #2 - Wow! Are those real?

    #1 worst opening line of all time:

    "Gee, for a fat girl, you sure don't sweat much."

    Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel's butt, just then a guy comes over and says, "What are you doing?"

    Osama replies, "About 2 miles back I heard someone say, 'Hey, look at the two assholes on that camel.'"

    What's the most famous coffee in Afghanistan?

    Osama bin Latte

    Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?

    Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush

    Air Head on a Beer

    Why did the blonde take a ladder into the bar?
    She heard the drinks were on the house
  • Truth in advertising is an alien notion to you, isn't it? :D

  • Now, here is a funny one for ya WB!! (I liked those flamingchopper!! My favourite line is #5!! :D )

    It was the morning after the consummation of the marriage of WreckinBall and his new bride. The new bride awoke purring. Hearing WreckinBall running water in the bathroom, she said, "Did you just brush your teeth?"

    WB answered, "Yes, dear. And while I was at it, I brushed yours too."

    :lol: :P

    The Pope had become very ill and was taken to many doctors, none
    of whom could figure out how to cure him. Finally he was brought
    to an old physician, who stated that he could figure it out.

    After about an hour's examination he came out and told the
    cardinals that he knew what was wrong. He said that the bad news
    was that it was a rare disorder of the testicles.

    He said that the goods news was that all the Pope had to do to
    be cured was to have sex. Well, this was not good news to the
    cardinals, who argued about it at length.

    Finally they went to the Pope with the doctor and explained the
    situation. After some thought, the Pope stated, "I agree but
    under four conditions."

    The cardinals were amazed and there arose quite an uproar. Over
    all of the noise there arose a single voice that asked, "And
    what are the four conditions?"

    The room stilled. There was a long pause. The Pope replied,
    "First the girl must be blind, so that she cannot see with whom
    she is having sex. Second, she must be deaf, so that she cannot
    hear with whom she is having sex. And third, she must be mute so
    that if somehow she figures out with who she is having sex, she
    can tell no one."

    After another long pause a voice arose and asked, "And the fourth
    condition?" The Pope smiled and replied, "Big tits."
  • The latter was much funnier than the former there, Speedie.
  • Nice jokes, they were good, I liked them all! You should try the Jokefest next time!
  • Yay....more good jokes!

    Hmm...i liked the one about WB for some strange reason! ;)

  • The three types of women orgasimes

    #1 (the real thing) YES!! YES!! YES!!
    #2 (An Ok one) OH, yes
    #3 (A fake one) Oh yes WB! Oh yes WB! :D :lol: :D :lol:
    Oooooooohhhhh, Unidentified, that was tooooooooooo friggin' funny!!!!!!!! You made me choke on my Sprite!!!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
    (You're HIRED!!!)
  • Hey WB When you go to the mind reader, do you get half price?

    Blondes and Babies

    A young blonde comes home from school and asks her mother,

    "Is it true what Rita just told me? That babies come out of the same place where boys put their thingies?"

    "Yes, dear," replied her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and she wouldn't have to explain it.

    "But then when I have a baby, won't it knock my teeth out?"

    In the back woods of West Virginia, the redneck's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to be a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing." Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. "Whoa there," said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down...I think there's yet anotherone to come."Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl. "No, no, don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern...It seems there's yet another one in there!"cried the doctor. The Redneck scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, "Do you think it's the light that's attractin' 'em?"