Genuine Counil Complaints That Made Me Chuckle
  • To help you forget your every day problems and read how others put their thoughts into words. These are genuine clips from (UK) council complaint letters.

    1. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has Fungus growing in it.

    2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just
    Can't take it anymore.

    3. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.

    4. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

    5. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

    6. And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against
    my fence.

    7. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet
    roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.

    8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

    9. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the
    wall.

    10. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife
    tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

    11. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen

    12. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.

    13. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

    14. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is
    cleared.

    15. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny
    colour and not fit to drink.

    16. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

    17. I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.

    18. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

    19. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a
    third so please send someone round to do something about it.

    20. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you
    please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

    21. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and
    satisfy my wife.

    22. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I
    still have no satisfaction.

    23. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we
    can't get BBC2.

  • LMFAO!!!

    This would have had me in fits of laughter had I not been in a Uni computer lab at the time with people all around studying.

    Cant be making a fool of myself now can I, lol, I am going to read them again when I get home and laugh my donkey/ horse crossbreeded animal right off!
  • Hey ive never seen your donkey/ horse crossbreeded animal