That is a really scary statement.
You really should seek help, I'm serious. It isn't a good sign that you want to kill people and that the only thing stoping you is the chance of getting caught most certainly isn't either.
You should really seek some anger management help or whatever they're called, for your own sake and those around you.
Many people say that they "could kill" someone but it's more of a saying and nothing that they accually want. What you wrote Spideklown didn't come out that way.