Have I ever wished another person dead? Sure......but only while still in the throes, of a raging fury!
Thankfully, this does not occur often, and it is only a 'brief and fleeting "Thought" (being the key word here.). But that is as far as it goes!!!!
A "Thought", nothing more, nothing less. It concerns me greatly, that you appear to have gone a step or two further, and your only impediment seems to be your fear of being incarcerated?
I don't profess to know you, nor what may have lead to a statement such as that? But, I too suggest you seek some form of help? Or, at the least some form of 'outlet', for your anger, such as was suggested by other members here?
My personal two fav's, are either stomping round the house. Dust cloth in one hand, vaccum in the other.......and clean/ polish everything within a 5K radius. Or.......turning up the stereo, locking myself in my room and "swearing like a Trooper"!!!! ..........I tend to opt for the first, rather than the later. As I need to be mindful of young 'ears'!

Best of luck spider! eace: